Late on Sunday evening a Barça fan was driving home down a remote country lane when he was overtaken by a speeding car with a Real Madrid flag hanging out of the window. The driver tooted his horn victoriously before disappearing around the next bend. When the dejected Barça fan got round the bend he was surprised to see the Madrid fan’s car had crashed into a tree. The Barça fan stopped his car and went to see what had happened. When he opened the car door he could see the Madrid fan was still conscious but he seemed to have broken his legs and was obviously in a lot of pain.

“Shit, that looks bad” said the Barça fan, “I’ll call for help”. He then produced a hip flask and said to the Madrid fan, “Hey, I know we are enemies and Madrid just won in Camp Nou, but you seem to be in a lot of pain. Have some whisky, it will help to ease the pain”.

The Madrid fan thanked him and took a drink. “No, no, drink some more,” said the Barça fan, “it will help to calm you down”. The Madrid fan drank some more. Twenty minutes later and the Madrid fan had finished all the whisky when the Guardia Civil arrived on the scene.

As the policeman came over to the car, the first thing the Barça fan said was, “Officer, officer, I really think you should breathalyze this man. He was driving like a maniac and he’s obviously as drunk as a skunk.”

Merry Christmas readers.